But let’s be clear, I’m not bringing a covered dish over to your house and I’m certainly not inviting you over for a meal I spent all Saturday preparing. It’s just not me. Cooking does NOT bring me joy — not even a little. (Eating does, and I do it well. Preparing it, not so much.)
Personality tests are one of the single most significant inventions in the history of the world. They give you your business strengths, your core needs, your love language, your spiritual gifts. I was just a walking bundle of undefined instincts until a 100 question test told me how to understand myself.
I love these tests. (Just so long as I agree with the results, that is. If I do not agree with the results, then I make a mental note that that test was designed by an inferior company and is in no way scientifically correct.)
Allow me to open the door and share my soul with you…
• Meyers-Briggs: ENFP
• Strengths-finder: Strategy, Activator, Significance, Competition & Focus
• Core Need: Freedom and Flexibility
• Love Language: Words of Affirmation
• DISC: D
• Enneagram: 7/8 with 3 right there too.
• Spiritual Gifts: Leadership, Discernment, Exhortation, Wisdom
Nerd test takers unite! We don’t need to share a cup of coffee to know each other; just give me a few of your letters and numbers and I will know your SOUL — and you, my new friend, will know mine.
But why am I sharing this with you? Because throughout my many years of test taking, nowhere, on any test, did it even once say, “Dawn, culinary skills are a gift!” or “You’re really strong in the domestic arena!”
I am a bit of a domestic failure. I do NOT cook.
Sometimes, when I say I don’t cook, people get this panicked look on their faces — like maybe I don’t feed my child. Or they’re wondering if every meal is chicken nuggets and french fries. No, it is not. Of course I can cook quick, simple things. Stop being so dramatic, people.
But you know what? That’s OK. It isn’t because I cannot intellectually figure out HOW to cook, it’s because I do not WANT to. There’s a difference, and it is a very freeing feeling when you embrace it.
The crazy thing is that it took me until my mid 40s to totally embrace this and be out loud and proud about it.
Figuring out who you are is hard. Being confident enough to stand up and say “Nope, not my thing!” is even harder. But boy howdy (that’s a thing), does it feel good when you do it! It’s liberating and empowering. It’s like Maria running across the Alps in The Sound of Music.
There is a joy in figuring out who you are and are NOT created to be. And that joy — like all joy — is contagious. I recently mentioned my boycott of cooking to a friend, and suddenly there was a wash of relief over her face and body as she began confessing to me all sorts of woman-burdens she was ready to abandon.
When you start sharing with the world who you are, you’re also giving permission to those around you to do the same. You empower others simply by being YOU.
That’s why I don’t cook, I am helping you. You’re welcome.
Instead, I go where my strengths take me — like hosting a lively and dynamic women’s group, mentoring women or picking out the healthiest place to get our takeout dinner from. It makes me very happy to not create things in my kitchen.
In short: if it doesn’t bring you a level of joy, don’t do it.
WARNING: Don’t use that last statement as a battle cry to never have to clean the toilet again or do mundane things because they don’t bring you joy. We still have to do yucky things.
Instead, let it motivate you to figure out what your gifts are and run with them. Yes, you have gifts, great gifts. I promise you: God didn’t forget anyone. And if you’re struggling to figure out what your gifts are, let me know. I’ve got just the personality test for you.
Here are a few fun links for test taking, some charge a fee.